What Are We Teaching Our Children?
Words are powerful. We must use great care when speaking to children. Sometimes we get frustrated with behavior, we get tired, or we may just be in a bad mood, and things come out that we really don’t even mean, but these words can still hurt and leave emotional scars, especially if no apology ever comes.
Some parents think that to keep up an appearance of authority, they must never admit they ever did or said anything wrong. As a child, I respected my parent that apologized, the one who openly admitted when something said or done wasn’t the best. I respect people who can easily apologize. This is a hallmark of great strength, not weakness. Mistakes will be made. We are human, though we may have the best of spirit-core intentions, we still struggle. We still misspeak and make blunders. Much worse than a mistake, is the attempt to “cover it up” or minimize someone else’s pain.
What if we were taught that if we don’t perform certain tasks, such as studying the bible every day, or praying every day, we will “shrink,” or become “less-than” as people? These concepts can be put into cute little songs that children love to sing, but the shame can take root in their minds and follow them all their lives. I grew up in a church that was constantly telling me that I was “nothing” compared to God. I share this experience with many others who have grown up to be self-doubting adults, terrified that whatever they do, however they try to perform all the tasks that God “requires,” they will never get it all done. They secretly feel that they are doomed to shrink more and more each day, in God’s eyes and the eyes of those who perform those tasks more perfectly.
Where Did These Ideas Come From?
Anyone can write things down and claim that they are from God. It is up to us to look deep into our own hearts, to find truth and love that is eternal. How many concepts do we believe because someone taught us to believe them? Protecting our children is more than just protecting them from physical harm. Protecting them from emotional harm is every bit as important.
A positive approach to their concept of God, Goddess, Universe, Source, or however you refer to the great power of creation, is immensely important to their self-concept and esteem.
One of my dearest spirit guides has expanded my thinking so much, for which I am truly grateful. In the Angel Michael Oracles book, I share what I learned by listening to this loving spirit:
“Would you rather go to church, or be in LOVE? I went to church because I loved God with all my heart. I thought I needed to do this to make Him happy. I didn’t want to disappoint God. I loved being with the people, whom I also thought were there because they loved God. I wanted to find ways to be closer to him – by going to church.
Going to church can be great. Some people love it and it is a beloved part of their week and their life.
But sometimes church can be like “food” that we eat without reading the label – we eat and eat because we think it’s good for us. We may not even like it.
Going deeper now.
Wherever you go, you take your heart with you, your filters, your opinions, your beliefs.
Wouldn’t it be nice if on the doors of every church there was an ingredients list? There may be wonderfully healthy things in there for you, but would you still go if you saw poison in the list, along with all of the healthy stuff?
Ingredients: Generosity, Kindness, Love, Fellowship, Friendship, judgment, intolerance, jealousy, control, fear…
I love the people so much. I still love many of my experiences at church, and no matter where you go you find these things. It is human nature. We are multi-faceted. There are things to learn from every aspect of our fascination with any one of these “ingredients.”
You go into a movie theater and you will find the same ingredients – because you have people.
But in a movie theater, no one is telling you that they are speaking the words of God, and that God will judge you if you don’t believe what is said in the movie. Movies can make you think, teach you lessons, remind you of what it’s like to be in love if you’ve forgotten, and most of all, let you come to your own conclusions regarding what you think of the content of the movie.
Some movies are better sermons than any sermon I’ve ever sat through.
It should be all about love…”
Passion for LOVE
Some of us are led to do certain things in our lifetime. I feel a deep passion for shouting from the rooftops that God is truly LOVE. When I see or hear children being taught that God is either someone to fear or someone who demands more than we can possibly keep up with, I feel passionate to share what healed me from feeling less-than, full of doubt, and having tremendously low self-esteem. I’ve been helped by listening to my heart, (which I was told as a child was “wicked and deceitful”). I’ve been renewed by listening to spirit guides who have gone through the same type of “you-are-less-than” training in their various lifetimes.
I respect my friends who choose not to believe in a higher-power at all, because their concept of source power has been ruined by “you-are-less-than” teaching, among other things. I understand many of their reasons for turning away from any type of spirituality. I don’t blame them.
My path is my path. I respect others’ paths. We can learn from each other when love is our guide.
You Are Everything Compared to God
When I was a vulnerable child I was eager to learn who God was, how to please him, and what he expected of me. I was told as fact, that compared to God, I was nothing. Men taught me that. My personal communication from God was very different. If they want to believe that they are nothing compared to God, that is fine. What I saw was that they were constantly trying to, with FEAR tactics, control people in their congregations, while seeking for themselves power and status. I was scared of them, but I didn’t love them. There were some exceptional pastors that did focus mostly on love, but they were still teaching many defeating concepts in the mix.
This is often how children are taught to feel about God. It’s a lethal mix of fear, love and shame. Sensitive children, eager to please, often are overwhelmed with the shame and never feel truly loved. This follows them into adulthood.
Before we teach them fear and shame, children are naturally so connected – so spiritual. Why would we ever take that away from them? The truth, as I’ve experienced it, is that the LOVE never goes away, no matter how buried it may be, we still have access. We can re-discover it at any time. But why give an innocent and trusting child so much to have to heal from later on in life?
Stop the cycle. Did it ever occur to anyone to LISTEN to the children who are so in-tune with heavenly wisdom? They could teach us a lot, if we would take the time. Stop for a moment with our quest to make sure that they are trained to see the world as we do. Stop. Listen.
It did occur to one of my dearest spirit guides in his most recent physical lifetime. All of our spirit guides send the same message. LOVE. There is no fear in love.
“In worship, people tend to think of paying homage to someone or something OUTSIDE of themselves. There is awe for the being they see as above them in some way.
In some churches it is said, “You are nothing compared to God.”
Going deeper now.
You are everything compared to God. You are everything desired, you are everything dreamt of. You are so close to God that your spirit heart beats in time to every other creature’s intention in this vast “ocean of consciousness.”
If I said, “You are God,” many would find that blasphemous, and so I leave you to make up your own mind.
If I say, you are spirit, the same spirit that is God’s heart, the same energy that is the light of God’s face, the same beauty that is God’s mind, maybe you can accept it without feeling fear or anger.”
If you are awed by beauty and life and spectacular sunsets, you are not ashamed and feeling less than, you are feeling appreciation for the wonders that you helped to create. You.”
I will spend this lifetime sharing these messages as I hear and understand them. All spirit is telling us the same message over and over and over. LOVE. All of the power of the Universe is in your fingertips. Feel your power. It is love. Teach the children that they are LOVE. Or better yet, let them teach you. They already know.